This is The Public Speaker: Quick and Dirty Tips For Improving Your Communication Skills . With your host, Lisa B. Marshall.
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Recently I attended a training course in New York City and at the start of the course each of us introduced ourselves. The senior executive sitting next to me said, and I quote, "I, like, work for a big bank, like, Citibank. I work, um, in technology, and head-up a group of like, 500 people, right. I do, like, technology risk assessment, right, and create, um, processes, to, like, reduce risk, right." I was shocked.
He was a business professional, a senior director at a major organization, and yet he sounded more like a valley girl. His speech was so infected with "like," "right, and "um" that the message was muddled and he significantly diminished his credibility. These "credibility killers” -- fluency disruptions -- communicate doubt, especially at the end of a phrase. When he was talking, I found myself thinking, "Doesn't he know how exactly many people work for him? Does he work for Citibank, or does he really work somewhere else?" What Are Disfluencies?
Disfluencies, in general, weaken messages. They're distracting for your listeners and they make you sound bad. In the first 30 seconds I counted four "likes" and three "rights" and two "ums". Worse, I'm certain that Tom had no idea that his speech was infected with these verbal viruses. In his defense, credibility killers (e.g. like, so, you know, right, uh, ah) are actually really common in everyday conversation. Researchers say that about 20% of “words” in everyday conversation are disfluencies.
In fact, people around the world fill pauses in their own way. In Britain they say "uh," Hebrew speakers say "ehhh," the Turks say "mmmmm." The Japanese say "eto" (eh-to) and "ano" (ah-no), Spanish speakers "esto", and Mandarin speakers "neige" (NEH-guh) and "jiege" (JEH-guh). In Dutch and German it's "uh, um, mmm." In Swedish it's "eh, ah, aah, m, mm, hmm, ooh, a and oh" (man, this is starting to sound like an x-rated podcast, I'd better stop, I think you have the idea!) As a communication coach, I notice disfluencies the most when people are nervous. In fact, for some people it's the only time these little buggers show up. Unfortunately, that's usually when clear and confident communication is most important! So today's episode is about what can you do to boost your immunity to these viruses. Its about how you can reduce disfluencies. Notice I didn't say get rid of them all together. Reduction, versus complete elimination, should be your goal.
Um, Like... Do I Have Disfluencies?
The first and most important step towards more fluent speaking is to become aware of your distracting speech habits.The fastest way to find out if you have trouble in this area is to ask a close trusted friend (or public speaking coach, hint, hint).
Anyway, perhaps the BEST way is to record yourself. If you are comfortable with technology I suggest using free audio editing software (Garageband on mac and Audacity for PC). With this software you actually see your words in audio format. For a more simplistic solution try Utterz.com--you can just call a phone number and it will record your voice.
Once you've got some sample recordings, the next step is play back your recordings several times. Listen specifically for your disfluences—go ahead and make of game of it. First just list them and then start counting them. If you are counting past three or four, you'll know you have a problem. If recording seems like too much effort, just, focus, for one full week, on listening, really listening carefully for distracters when you talk. Some experts like to suggest you put tiny “um” and “ah” stickers on your computer or cell phone to remind you to be listening.
Trust me, after a week of listening, or recording and listening, you'll have become acutely aware of your specific problems. And that's exactly what you need; awareness. You need to be able to hear your disfluencies in your mind before you blurt them out.
How to Reduce Your Credibility Killers If you've done your homework you'll know when one of your credibility killers is just about to escape from your mouth. Then, all you'll need to do is to keep quiet. I know, easier said than done. At first you'll have awkward pauses in your speech, but that's still better, actually far better, than speech peppered with "likes" and "ums." Eventually the pauses get shorter. With time, you'll be more fluent and have fewer "ums" and "ahs." So the next time you introduce yourself, be warned, somebody sitting next to you might just be counting your "ums", "ahs", and "you knows". Don't let your disfluencies kill your credibility. It really is worth it to take some time to focus on this. It can make a big difference in how you're perceived. When you're traveling for business, it shouldn't be a big pain, it should be easy to access your office files from your laptop. With GoToMyPC.com, you can get to your office machine securely, access and transfer files, run applications, and even view presentations Try it free for 30 days at GoToMyPC.com/podcast.
This is Lisa B. Marshall, The Public Speaker, passionate about communication, your success is my business.
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